Embracing Loss To Win In Life

Embracing Loss to WinTo win or to lose…that is the question. The answer? How about both?

It is said that in life, you win and lose on a daily basis. But what is winning if you have not ever lost? And what is losing if not to give us more feedback on what we need to do to win?

We are generally taught and conditioned to avoid losing…to avoid failure…to view ourselves as failures for failing. What is lost in this conditioning is that until we actually lose or fail, we can never fully grasp the concept of winning. Without truly appreciating this “Yin” we can never appreciate the “Yang”.

Let us observe the other polarities in life:

  • Where there is “Yin”, there is “Yang”
  • Where there is “Push”, there is “Pull”
  • We have “Men” and we have “Women”
  • If something is “Hot”, something else is “Cold”
  • There is “Positive”, and there is “Negative”
  • …and we can go on and on.

So clearly we are surrounded by opposite polarities everywhere.

Why then do we avoid losing like the plague and when we DO lose, we punish ourselves incessantly so that it becomes a negative event that results in such responses such as:

  • Bad Sportsmanship
  • Negative Self-Talk
  • Anger
  • Hate
  • Depression
  • Etc.

If we simply shift our perspective to embrace losing or failure as a lead in to great wins and successes, we will:

  • Learn more from our failures
  • Maintain growth in our lives (continue taking steps forward instead of taking a step back each time we fail)
  • Get significantly more reward from our wins and successes.

Think about a sport or game that you love and imagine how much you would actually love the game if the game didn’t have a polarity of “loss” or “failure” as a component of it. Would you still get as much joy out of it? Would you still love it as much?

So what do we do to shift ourselves out of that undesirable mindset? Here is just one simple process of the many we offer at The Life Oasis to go through that, over time, can help improve how we deal with loss and failure so that we accelerate our growth towards winning and enjoy ourselves in the process:

  1. Immediately, at the point of confirmed loss or failure, close your eyes (if possible) and take a deep breath to center yourself. Take 3-5 breaths if feasible. 
  2. Express gratitude to yourself, the winner, and the universe for creating this experience that has now become a phenomenal growth opportunity. 
  3. Go through all the winning moments of the event and completely bathe yourself in that feeling with the understanding that the process or the journey itself is independent of the end result. 
  4. Next, inventory all the areas where you can improve on in the next opportunity to help achieve the desired end result. The next opportunity could be: the next time you compete, the next business you start, or even the next relationship you find. Make sure you know…clearly…what your desired end result is. When it’s, then our process will be vague too. 
  5. Make a list of those areas and prioritize them based on highest impact towards increasing your chances of “winning”. Make sure that none of these areas are areas where you are blaming external influences that are out of your control. Focus only on what you can do for yourself. 
  6. Visualize yourself in a state where you have already made the necessary improvements and what it looks, sounds, and feels like as a winner. Once again, immerse yourself completely in that state and live in it for a good 5-10 minutes so that your body and mind knows exactly what to strive for. 
  7. Have trust and faith in yourself that you will make it happen and reach your desired goal. Incorporate another round of gratitude for yourself for having allowed this process to happen knowing that you are already a greater person for doing it.

This entire process is a success habit that, once incorporated into your life tool chest, will happen almost instantaneously in your mind so that you will always grow from all the “losses” and “failures” we encounter.

Embracing Failure To Succeed

Did you encounter any of these challenges over the weekend? If so, apply this process and let us know how it goes! Comment below as well if you have any questions about this method.

Happy Monday! Let’s make it a winning week!

 

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